Wednesday, December 21, 2011
I'm hoping that this year will be the year of getting healthy. Physically, mentally and emotionally. I want to get myself organized - get my house in order, get my schedule cleaned up and really crack down on discipline. Here's my plan, in no particular order:
1) Make an effort with my appearance. I will attempt to dress presentably and wear makeup at least 5 days a week. Ideally 6 days a week. I can wear yoga pants and sweatshirts if I'm really going to be doing a lot of cleaning or yard-work, but that's it. When I feel like I look good, I feel good about myself. And when I feel good about myself, it positively impacts every other part of my life.
2) I will work out every day even if I only do 20 situps. Usually, if I get a start, I want to keep going. It's motivating myself to get my tush out of my chair to do something that's the hard part. But if I tell myself I only have to do 20 situps or 5 minutes of running, then I'll be more likely to start. I can quit after my tiny goal. But odds are, I'll want to keep going.
3) Eat a healthy diet 5 days a week. I have a HUGE sweet tooth. And I love carbs. And in winter, telling myself I have to eat healthily is like telling myself I'm going to lace up some boots and climb Mt. Everest. I'm a lot more likely to eat fruits, veggies and grains 5 days a week if I know I can bake a pie on Saturday (or have a bagel for breakfast on Sunday - or whatever). To this end, I can't keep junk in the house. If there is chocolate, I will eat 9 pieces in an afternoon. If we have bread 'on hand,' I will eat toast all day. If I've got mac'n'cheese in the cupboard 'just in case we're snowed in,' I will make it for lunch the next day. I am a weak weak person and I can't keep junk in the house. Which means I'll have to plan my menus carefully. It means I need to have healthy 'in case of snow' meals in the freezer. It means I have to have lunch pre-made in the morning so I'm not seduced by the call of Panda Express when we're all ravenous after preschool. It's doable - I just have to make myself do it.
4) Get up at 6:30. My poor kids are suffering from my own laziness. I sleep in as late as possible in the morning, dawdle with getting out of bed, putter around with email and odds and ends and then get them up in a big fat rush because I keep trying to get them all fed and dressed and out the door in 20 minutes. So, I WILL get up at 6:30 every day. I don't have to work out. I don't have to shower. But I will do a devotional (what better way to get myself prepared for the day), quickly check my email and get myself dressed (nicely - with makeup) for the day and have breakfast started and clothes laid out before I get the kids up - hopefully by 7:30. If I can do that, we should cut down on a LOT of morning angst.
5) I will make quiet-hour shorter. Quiet hour lately has drawn out to quiet-two-hours (or more). Which is fine for the younger two who nap that long. And fine for Mommy who gets done a ton of blogging and cleaning and crafting and sleeping. But it's miserable for big brother who does not nap and, though he is ingenious in his creative use of such a long chunk of time in his room by himself with a box of toys, I know he misses Mommy. We used to spend naptime together reading books and playing. Then Mommy realized she was a nicer person if she got a SMALL break in the afternoon and we instituted quiet hour. And then Mommy realized how nice quiet hour was and it has gradually gotten out of hand. Therefore, I resolve to do what I must to make quiet hour stick closer to the hour-long mark. Nap first, errands second, clean third - the rest I'll have to fit in somewhere else.
6) To that end - Spend less time on the computer. I blog a LOT. Which is ok if I plan things out in advance and do as much of it as I can before getting up for the day. But I also enter all kinds of online giveaways, play around on Pinterest and generally waste tons of time on the internet. Time that I could be spending napping, cleaning, crafting and doing all those other things that make quiet hour so long. My plan is - leave the computer downstairs. That way, I can't work on it while I'm with the kids. They (and the house) get my undivided attention, and I'll have to learn to prioritize what I do on the computer during "my" time.
7) Keep a tidier, cleaner house. By bedtime, I'm pooped and don't want to clean. In the mornings, I'm in too much of a rush. And in the afternoons I know that anything I do will just be undone again by bedtime. So it never gets done. But I'm going to work toward both a) cleaning more with my newfound time that I won't be spending on the computer or frittering away at quiet hour, and by b) re-organizing the house to make it more efficient. If there's a spot that is always dirty or always covered in piles, it needs to be re-thought. And I can learn to multi-task. Clean the bathroom while the kids bathe, wipe down the kitchen while the kids eat breakfast, use vacuuming as a discipline tactic (my kids love to vacuum). There are lots of ways to keep this nest a little more nicely feathered - if I take the time to plan. Time that I'm hoping to gain back by being more efficient in all the above ways.
So - wish me luck - it's going to be a journey and I'll have a lot of setbacks I know, but I think it will be more than worth it in the end. I'm so tired of feeling scattered and hurried and cranky and disorganized all the time. I need to rework my life and make it run a little more smoothly or I'm really going to go off the rails some day. So here goes!
And how about you, what are your goals?
Thursday, December 8, 2011
The bad news is - mirrors lie. My bedroom mirror (the only full-length mirror in the house) is, (as Elaine Benes puts it) a skinny mirror. I always look awesome in that mirror. I look tall and thin and hip. It's a great ego boost. Until I see myself in a store window, a photograph, or someone else's mirror. And then I realize just how wide my hips really are. And how tall I'm not.
The good news - I can choose only to look in the skinny mirrors. How others see me is not based on how I see myself. If I only look in that bedroom mirror, I will feel like I look awesome. And that will give me confidence. And confidence will make me look awesome. I can walk right by those shop windows and dressing room mirrors and choose not to look and continue feeling like a million bucks. I can rock the skinny jeans like I own that style. But if I never dared to try something new because I was afraid I 'might look fat,' then I'd spend all my life hiding from the world in my big ol' sweats and I'd look as terrible as I felt.
I'll be frank - I think I was meant to be a bear. Every single winter, I put on 10 lbs of 'insulation.' I can barely pull myself out of bed and just want to sleep till spring. But that's what chunky sweaters are for, right? And, honestly, I have such a hard time staying warm in winter in the first place (yes, I am currently waiting on the results of a thyroid test), that I can probably use all the extra padding I can get.
So, I'm currently saying sayonara to my "goal weight." I'm not going to make it to 110 by New Years. Duh. I'm still stuck at 122 and there's no healthy way to make it. I'm going to embrace my winter weight. I'm going to keep on dressing up my new skinny jeans with tunics and hot boots. I'm going to enjoy every last bite of those toasty bagels with cream cheese. And when spring rolls around I'm going to hit the pavement, break out the watermelon and sculpt some abs.
Sound like a plan?
Thursday, December 1, 2011
- All the pie! We seriously had 4 pumpkin pies on Thanksgiving. We ate one the first day while we were with family, and then we had 3 to eat all by ourselves. And I can't eat pie without a TON of whipped cream. So that didn't go well.
- Leftovers. I feel like my fridge has been taken over by leftovers. It took a week to eat all the stuffing. Then I made spaghetti for dinner and that lingered for days. Plus the cookies and the gingerbread and various other treats. It seems like as quickly as we finish one rich dish, another one pops up in it's place.
- It's cold out. Which means I want hot food. And when I think hot food, I do NOT think "big streaming bowl of vegetables." I think spaghetti, or mac'n'cheese, or hot chocolate. Comfort foods.
- I keep getting sick or injured. First I had a weird bout of exhaustion. Then I got a sinus infection. The I pulled a muscle in my foot. It seems like there's always some health issue keeping me from working out.
- I had a reality check. Yesterday I went shopping at the mall for the first time in ages. I tried on clothes. And I almost cried. Somehow the mirror in my bedroom makes me look a LOT slimmer than the mirrors in the dressing rooms. Those were only too happy to show me where all the pudge was sticking out of the clothes I tried on. And I thought I knew my size, but boy was I wrong. And I bought skinny jeans that I'll probably never have the courage to wear in public (even with a tunic top and chunky boots). BUT it gave me the motivation to skip the fried rice in favor of a salad at lunch. And it gave me the motivation to suck it up and do my workout video at naptime (um, ow, I still hurt). My pride is wounded, but maybe it was the extra push I needed to stop being apathetic and really work toward this goal again.
- AND I have a new goal. I don't just want to lose weight. That would be awesome and all, but what I really want (and I think I've said this before), is to gain muscle. Even at 95 lbs I still had chub. I was very 'soft.' And my complaints yesterday weren't so much how wide I was as how squishy I was. I want definition. I want Jillian Michaels muscles. I started from the top of her 30 Day Shred video again yesterday and let me tell you - I don't have a muscle that doesn't ache. Which is a really really good thing! Now we'll see if I can make it past day 5 (I keep getting sick around then). I'm hoping that by using naptime to work out instead of getting up early, I might be able to stick with it longer.
- My parents are coming to town this weekend. Which is wonderful! But, it also means celebrating baby girl's birthday (again) and doing an early Christmas (plus doing the regular one on the 25) and knowing me, I'm going to want to celebrate with food. I'm going to do my darnedest to make sure that we eat really healthfully for every other meal while they're here, and I'm going to make sure that I keep working out even though I have guests. But I know it's going to be hard to keep myself motivated.
- I can't reach my goal in time. Nothing short of a stomach flu is going to get me down 12 lbs in 4 weeks. Not without starving myself or going back on the detox diet (which I refuse to do during the holidays). So I'm going to have to readjust my expectations. Which means dealing with the idea of my friends seeing me while I'm "still really fat" - and doing some strategic wardrobe planning to make sure I pack clothes that make me feel good. I know they don't care how I look. I'm sure they think I look fine. But if I don't feel fine, I'm going to let it bum me out. So - I need to pack the cute tops and the fun boots and then slap on a smile (and lots of makeup) and just go with it.
- I've been having some problems with hormones lately (seriously - like, getting tested tomorrow kinda problems). Which isn't such a big deal except that I find it really easy to get depressed. The sort where all I want to do is run and never stop. But I don't have the energy to move off the couch. I've found that working out does help. So does listening to upbeat music. I'm really going to try not to let myself get into a funk, because it's not useful for anyone.
Wednesday, October 26, 2011
I appear to be down to 118.5 on an empty stomach. So woot for that. Only 8 more lbs to go till I hit my "reasonable goal." Think I can do it by the end of December?
The juice fast didn't take. I did juice for breakfast for one day, and was so mean and cranky by lunch that I had to eat something or risk yelling at my kids. So - I guess I'll just supplement with juice when I feel like I'm lacking in fruits and veggies and otherwise just try to eat healthily (and kick my thrice-weekly-Snickers habit).
I'm also looking for good tv shows to get addicted to. I think I'll be more willing to get up (or skip nap) to work out if I have something I can't wait to watch while I do it. Anyone got recommendations?
It's a journey - I must remember that. But I also know I have the speedbumps of birthday, Thanksgiving, birthday, Christmas and New Years coming up (all that feasting = lbs lbs lbs!). So, I'll do what I can now that does NOT involve starving myself and that will have to be good enough.
Saturday, October 22, 2011
So today, after a week or more of talking about it, I finally started my juice fast. What exactly does that mean? Well, for a few days I'll be having juice for breakfast (apple with grape, primarily) and juice for lunch (carrot with tomato, primarily). For dinner? Real food!!! I'm not trying to starve myself to death. I just want to give my poor insides a break from all the high-fat, high-sugar, high-carb junk I've been eating. I also want to try to reset my mind and body so I don't crave all those things all the time. I was seriously thinking about fries and Snickers 24/7 (hubby and I even polished off an 8-pack of fun-size Snickers in about 5 minutes last night - we need help!) So, as you can see, I made a bunch of juice this morning - isn't the carrot pulp pretty?
I've had a couple of people ask me about our juicer. It's a Champion, as recommended by a co-worker of my husband's. His family eats a 90% raw-food diet (except for the one night a week they splurge) and they drink a LOT of juices. Fruit juices, veggie juices, green juices. And they are all SUPER healthy. So we thought we'd give it a try. Not the raw food, of course, but the juicing thing. Honestly, we don't make actual juice all that often. It takes an enormous amount of produce to yield anything more than a couple glasses of juice and tossing all that pulp (albeit onto our garden) still feels wasteful. Besides which we lose a lot of fiber that way. But here are a few things we do use our juicer for:
1) Making juice - Homemade apple-grape juice is just about the yummiest thing ever.
2) Making "ice cream" - run some bananas or frozen mixed fruit through the juicer and you have a super yummy frozen treat!
3) Making purees - our juicer comes with a 'blank' (ie a solid piece of plastic vs the juicing screen). When you run foods through with the 'blank' on, they come out nicely pureed. We've made everything from baby-food to apple sauce this way.
So far the only food we've found that our juicer can't take on is kale - it's thick stems get all tangled in the blade and bog it down. However, drinking kale tastes a lot like drinking freshly-cut lawn - so why bother? It's much better used it soups and stir-fries (or baked as chips!)
So that's our juicing experience in a nutshell. Wish me luck on my mini-fast - I'm hungry already!
Thursday, October 20, 2011
I want to be thinner, but I don't want to work out or eat right.
I want my house to be sparkling and tidy, but I don't want to scrub things or pick up after the kids (again).
I want to save tons and tons of money, but I don't want to put much effort into budgeting or couponing. (And heaven forbid I should have to pass up on something I want likerightnow).
Therefore I remain chubby and broke in a dirty, cluttered house.
Ok ok, I know it's not as bad as all that. But I've been feeling really overwhelmed lately. I need structure. Lots of it. Otherwise I'm totally lost and I can't seem to get my bearings and all my 'good intentions' just fall through the cracks. Multitasking is my enemy - I just end up with a brain that is running in so many directions it stops working all together. SO I need to take a few minutes to set some concrete goals for my life. Some "resolutions" if you will, despite the fact that this year is almost over.
For the next few weeks I resolve to:
1) Make working out a priority. At least the night before, I pledge to plan out when I will exercise the next day - then stick with it. When I can, I'll work out with my husband in the evening. When I know I have to be away or we'll be super busy, I will either get up early (ugh) or commit to myself that I will do nothing at naptime before I have exercised. I will do cardio and strength. And sometimes, I will even have fun! (I'm hoping to get the boys outside for a game of tag today).
2) I will work my tush off to get my "weekly planner" board made. I'm very excited about this project. I'm refinishing an old dresser door, gluing on a white board, and adding a favorite verse and then a chart so I can track weekly meals and daily chores. I will schedule what I am serving for breakfast, lunch and dinner for at least 5 days a week (I'm ok with having no plan for weekends), what chores I am doing to keep the house tidy every weekday, AND a contingency plan or two for meals. This week I have had a lunch consisting of a peanut-butter apple and a snickers bar because I didn't leave myself time to eat. We had Panda Express today because I made today's scheduled lunch for dinner last night (thought hubby wasn't going to be home. then he was. what a mess). And I have NO idea what to cook tomorrow - fridge is getting empty. Ooof. Having all my meals plus a spare or two (something quick, cheap, and using 'on hand items') and all my daily chores in one place leaves me no excuse for "oh, I forgot" laziness.
3) I will make a detailed (cheap) grocery plan, go back to couponing and plan around store sales. It really doesn't take that long, I just don't do it. We've been storing up food in the freezer and I've been meaning to take a freezer inventory so I can use up the stuff in there. But I haven't gotten around to it, which means I'm winging it for meals and shopping several times a week and wasting TONS of money. So - I'll pick a regular time each week to make the list, print the coupons, circle the sales, etc. Let's see if we can get this budget back in shape.
4) I will prioritize!! My time and my money are two of my most precious commodities and I've been squandering them both. I need to remember that God comes first, my family comes second, and my hobbies come - well - somewhere way down the line. So I'm setting some rules for myself. No more buying craft supplies until I make a sale (or two or three) from my shop. If I have a super great idea - I'll just write it down. And I need to finish the 'important' projects (i.e. Christmas presents, commissioned items, etc) before I make random things for the shop. And the most important rule - just because it's on sale, doesn't mean it's cheap! If I don't need it for anything, I should just save the money even if it seems like a really good deal.
So - those are my current resolutions. Lets see if I can get myself back on track. I'm tired of feeling like I'm letting myself down every day, esp when being a little extra diligent and organized would make all the difference in the world. Feel free to ask me about it. Keep me on task. I'm hideous about being accountable to myself, but I'm a little better about not wanting to let down my friends. Thanks for all your support!
Tuesday, October 18, 2011
That said, a friend of mine just invited me to join him on My Fitness Pal. I used to use Sparkpeople with some success, but frankly, it's really hard to fit in the time to record all my food and all my workouts (well, ok, it's not so hard to record my lack of workouts.) But since I know he'll be keeping an eye on me (and vice versa) it's pretty good motivation to just do it already. And I know that tracking is good for me. I'm FAR more likely to actually stick to 2 oz of pasta if I wrote it down already. And I'm FAR more likely to put in at least 20 min on the elliptical if I calculated for the calories already (although, the program probably expects more than the casual stride I take on the machine - but hey, I've got a sinus infection, at least it's something!).
SO that being said, would anyone else like to join me on My Fitness Pal? No, it won't tell me how much you weigh or even what you're eating - but it will tell me if you're working out and meeting your calorie goals. And you can keep track of me, too! The more people tracking me, the better because goodness knows I sure need a lot of accountability to put down the chocolate and lace up my sneakers. I've still got 10-15 lbs to lose -won't you join me on the journey?
If you'd like an invite, send me your email and I'll shoot it on over! Let's get fit, y'all!
Thursday, October 13, 2011
1) Today I have eaten really well. I woke up feeling sick, I think because all the awful eating has caught up to me. So I've had lots of fruits and veggies and eggs and it really feels amazing! Sometimes my body also craves healthy foods - those are the cravings I need to listen to.
2) We took a nice brisk walk last night. I even had the urge to run, though I didn't. I'm hoping that tonight I'll go for it and try to get in a couple miles of run/walks. I'd stopped working out at night because I thought it was interfering with my sleep, but I slept like a baby last night! Here's hoping.
3) I'm planning a juice fast for a couple days next week. I feel starved for nutrients and gorged on junk and I think I really need to 'reboot' my body. Hoping it works out the way I'm planning - I think I'll feel a lot better.
1) Sleeping and being lazy and not working out. I have had NO energy the last couple of weeks and I need to kick start my workouts again.
2) Eating junk junk junk. Cornbread, biscuits, chocolate(!!!), take-out food, potato salad and hot-dogs - no wonder I feel awful! And I think I've gained a few pounds back, too. I feel fat and yucky - the way I always do when I cave in and quit being healthy.
What I'm planning:
1) Work out every evening and make that my priority. If I have to get the kids to bed 20 min sooner, so be it. If I can get back in the habit, I'll have more energy during the day. And getting up in the morning to work out just isn't happening.
2) Juice fast. Juice for 2-3 meals a day for 2-3 days. Flush out my system, beat these cravings, then start eating healthier again.
3) Get more sun. Winter makes me want to hibernate - which means I want to fill up on carbs, then sleep for a week. Ooooof. More sun and lots of up-beat music helps to wake me up and get me going - so that's my goal!
That's where I am right now - I notoriously gain 10 lbs of "insulation" every winter - this winter I want to be different - I want to take 15 lbs OFF - so here I go!
Sunday, September 4, 2011
You are not 18 anymore. You're not in college. You don't walk miles a day to class. It isn't convenient to skip meals. You should not be wearing college-girl clothes. No one expects you to squeeze back into that size 2 dress you bought when you were 16. You look at yourself and see lumps. Other people look at you and see curves. Some men love hips. Your husband loves hips. Still can't look past those lumps in the mirror? Go out and buy some Spanx. No more lumps, just curves. Eat well. Get your bum out of bed and exercise. Still can't squeeze into the size 2? Sell it to a college girl and buy yourself some hot "mom" clothes. You've had 3 kids - dress like it. No, not frumpy. Modest. Elegant. Nothing too short. Nothing too tight. Tunic tops are "in" - go harness that trend! Then look in the mirror, love what you see, and slap on your best accessory - the "I love myself" smile. Your parents didn't shell out big bucks for braces to hide those pretty teeth behind a frown. And quit whining! The most beautiful people are the most positive people. Stand up tall (good posture hides lumps, too) and be kind and gentle. Everything else you can hide with a great wardrobe.
Wednesday, August 24, 2011
- Didn't take the kids to Panda Express like I'd intended. Went to Doc Greens and had a salad (and ok, a small side of cheesy mashed potatoes) instead.
- Got up at 6 and did both my devotional and 30 min on the elliptical.
- Making healthy veggie stir-fry and rice/quinoa for dinner.
- Ate WAY too much froyo at Peachwave.
- Spent more than I intended because we ate out both lunch and snack.
- Ate half a dozen chocolate covered caramels while I cooked dinner.
- Plan ahead better so I don't wind up eating out to kill time.
- Chew gum while I cook.
- Stick to the getting up and working out - actually felt really good even though I was desperate for my afternoon nap.
Wednesday, July 27, 2011
How often do I go throughout my days with a feeling of entitlement and deprivation. I am entitled to having a weekend off and am deprived when I must stay home to do housework. I am entitled to sleeping in when I like and am deprived when I have to rise early to exercise. And most commonly, I am entitled to eating whatever I feel I would most enjoy, and am deprived when I have to eat all that healthy stuff. This attitude is making me nothing but fat and cranky and I think it's time for a change.
I spoke with a friend recently who mentioned that she and her husband are doing the Daniel Diet. As in, eating what Daniel in the Bible would have eaten. Daniel, who had to fight for his right to eat healthy foods in the natural state God created them. Daniel who willingly and gladly turned down the rich foods of the king's people. Daniel who was noticeably the strongest and healthiest servant in the court. This diet is, essentially, much like the Big Diet hubby and I did a couple months ago. Lots of fruits, nuts, grains - anything that can be harvested. No eggs like I was eating, though. Their diet lasts 10 days and she said that though she's hungry, she's feeling amazing. It made me think long and hard about how I've been feeling lately. Fat, lazy, generally 'off.'
We've been splurging a lot, lately. We've gone on date nights and stuffed ourselves at buffets. We've invited friends over for 'fried nights' full of greasy, breaded foods. I've been eating s'mores like they're going out of style. And I'm paying for it. I don't think the Lord minds if we treat ourselves to something decadent now and then. But His word is filled with reminders to be self controlled and avoid gluttony. The Lord gives us commands for our own good and He knows best what will make our bodies strong, healthy, and ready to do His work.
I've already got my menu planned out for the week, and it's not great. We've got a night of eating out and some meatloaf and leftover fried-food on there. But I do intend to eat as cleanly as I can this week, and once it's over - well I just need to do my best to be like Daniel 90% of the time, and the king 10% or less. I think treats are a good thing. They help me from feeling totally deprived and then stuffing myself with anything and everything I can find. But I need to remember that treats are just that - something special to spoil myself with now and then. I am not entitled to eating whatever will taste best at any given moment. I am not deprived if I eat healthy, whole foods that will increase my energy, boost my weight loss and improve my mood. I need to spend more time thanking the Lord that I have the resources to eat as He intends instead of grumbling that I never get to cook anything 'yummy.' Any time I start to complain that healthy food is boring I should thaw out a bag of raspberries. Oh. Yum. It's summer. Fruits and veggies are abundant and (relatively) cheap. So let's all celebrate the season by having a Daniel feast! Who's with me?
Wednesday, July 20, 2011
1) I really really need to work on getting up at 6 so I can go run/walk/work out in some manner while hubby is getting ready (so someone is with the sleeping kiddos) then get showered before they wake. I think I'll feel a lot better if I get my day started well before the wee ones are up, even if it means waking WAY too early. And then I can't have the "I'm too tired to work out/ don't want to be up all night" excuse like I do at night.
2) Seeing friends in Miami this December. Will probably involve donning a swimsuit at some point. Don't mind being chubby around family - but friends are another story. Top that with the fact that I usually gain 10 lbs each winter and it's a recipe for disaster. So, the goal is - get down to my ideal weight and add a little muscle by December. If I'm around 123 now, that means losing 13 lbs in 5 months - just under 3 lbs a month. Can do!
So here I go! Wish me luck. And if you have any good ab/arm/butt strengthening moves you want to share - please do :)
Saturday, July 9, 2011
1) Had Mexican food the other night on our usual Friday night out. This time, though, I savored it. I mean, really ate it slowly and paid attention to every bite. And when I was full, I stopped. And though I ate almost the entire plate of food, I didn't feel guilty about it, because I really had been very hungry and wasn't stuffed when I was done. And man, that cheese enchilada was heaven. And since I paid close attention to what I was eating, I don't feel like I'll need to indulge again like that soon.
2) Although, tonight we had 'fried night.' We've been planning this for ages. We breaded and fried eggplant, mozzarella sticks and cucumbers and summer squash. It was yummy. And I'd meant to eat super clean all day to leave room for it. But of course I wound up shopping all afternoon for groceries (never food shop hungry! eeek $$$$$ trip) and was ravenous when I got home so I had a turkey and cheese rice cake sandwich. But I had a huge pile of peaches and snow peas with it. But I chased it with the rest of my enormous chocolate bar because I wanted it gone - I really do think I'm allergic to chocolate and it makes me depressed. So no more chocolate for me except on special occasions. At least fried foods are heavy, so I didn't even finish a whole plate full. And I noshed some baby carrots and more snap peas on the side. Not a total fail I guess.
3) I made ice cream cake for my son's 2nd birthday. We were eating so much of it (somehow we had a ton of leftovers) we decided to let it melt and toss it. It hurt our wallets, but at least it didn't hurt our hearts (or hips :p).
4) I've been skinny obsessed again lately. Like, watching my favorite celebs literally gets me to stop eating. And sometimes it even makes me work out hard. So far, it's still been healthy - I'm making good choices. But if it gets obsessive, I'm going to have to media fast for a while. Because right now, these girls look good to me:
And I caught myself looking at a picture of Marie Osmond, who wears a size 2, and thinking "wow, she's kinda chubby" (um, no honey, those are called curves, and they're a good thing). And so the battle continues. I guess I've still got 15 lbs before I need to worry. And I really would like to fit back into my wedding rings (which are tight on my pinkie right now). I just need to remember that healthy is the goal and scary skinny is just stupid. Bleh.
So that's what's been happening with me and weight and body image lately. And if you talk to me, remind me that curves are good. Remind me that muscles are better. Remind me to get my tush and my toddlers out that door to take a walk in the morning (preferably before it gets blazing hot out - so I guess I'll be getting up at 5 am). Yeah.
Tuesday, June 28, 2011
I have NO idea what is in style or even looks good on me anymore. Some days I miss maternity clothes lol everything looks cute with a baby bump.
I am in serious need of a makeover. I hate absolutely everything about the way I look. I know it shouldn't matter, but for some reason it does.
I'd love to redo my wardrobe - everything I own is either ancient from college or a hand me down (which are stylish but not my color/size most of the time). But, I can't bare to spend any money on new clothes, it just seems silly when... my closet is overflowing. I really just need someone to help me put together some outfits that look good, then purge the rest of it. I also just need to grow out my hair again - I always forget how curly and awful it gets when it's short. Oh well. I recognize that what I look like really isn't important in the long run, but somehow when I don't look good I just feel 'off' somehow.
This is following a day where I just feel frumpy and ugly. It's probably just a result of wearing unflattering jeans and needing to get my haircut refreshed (angles look stupid when they get too long to tuck cutely behind the ears). But I'm also frustrated that I want new clothes that fit the body I have now but I'm too cheap (and ok my husband would kill me) to buy new clothes. And we ate really decadently this weekend (I had a huge Red Robin burger on Friday night, then we had company on Saturday night so I made lasagna and garlic bread and pie) so I'm feeling huge and swollen and uncomfortable and like an enormous blob, even though when I weighed in (with a full stomach and all my clothes on) this morning I was only 123.5. So I haven't really gained anything.
It's probably partly due to it being "that time" when I'm usually feeling gross and depressed anyway. But I've also found myself in all seriousness wishing I had the courage to make myself throw up. I can't seem to make myself starve anymore, so that sick part of my brain is looking for other options. I could never do it - the actual thought makes me shudder - but the fact that there's part of me that really wishes I could and thinks I'm weak because I can't just shows that I am seriously screwed up. And probably in need to some serious Bible time. It doesn't help that my husband (who can barely keep his pants up he's so skinny) complains all the time about being fat. I know he doesn't mean anything by it, but it makes me feel AWFUL! I keep thinking "wow, if you think you're fat, you must think I'm a disgusting hippo." Which of course he doesn't. He tells me I'm pretty sometimes - but I don't believe him. And sometimes I get the feeling that it grosses him out to see me eat. Which is ridiculous and all in my head -but I guess I needed to say it out loud to realize just how stupid it is.
Anyway, that's my struggle lately. That and wanting to bawl because I so desperately want to go for a run (or even do sit ups) during the day when I have energy but I can't because one baby is napping so I can't take them for a walk or if I lie down to do ab stuff I get two toddler sitting on my middle (and I'm just not buff enough yet to do my workout with all that extra weight). So when my workout is thwarted and I'm still eating like a cow my brain looks for any other option for not getting hideous and obese.
Bleh, ok, whine groan complain. I know that all that matters is that I'm kind to my husband and my kids and that I run my house well. But sometimes when I hate myself it gets me really down and then it's hard to be the woman I know I'm supposed to be. Maybe I need to copy out the Wife of Noble Character Proverb and post it somewhere. It doesn't say anywhere on there that she's gorgeous. In fact, the only beautiful women in the Bible (except Esther maybe?) are the 'stumbling blocks' for men - not good. It does say that she works hard and builds esteem for her family. So I know my goal - now I just need to rearrange my head and carry it out. Whew.
If you chat with me in person - give me a poke now and then and remind me what I'm really supposed to be working toward. Noble character and a healthy body. Yeah.
Monday, June 20, 2011
Tuesday, June 14, 2011
So. To get to what this post is really about. I am, and always have been, the sort of person who gets dressed up to go to Walmart. Well, not really 'dressed up' perse - but I do make sure that I'm at least wearing jeans (instead of sweats) and jewelry and that my hair is presentable. I try only to wear gym clothes to the gym and if I can help it I wear makeup whenever I leave the house. But the other day I ran off to the library with the kids without putting on jewelry or checking my hair or wearing makeup. And I wasn't the least bit self conscious. Because I didn't notice until the car ride home. I was so busy getting kids buckled and keeping them from being run over and making sure they didn't tear up books or run into the parking lot that I wasn't paying any attention to myself or what other people might think of me. And it was really really nice. Frankly, I'm sure most people hardly notice me. After all, I can't tell you what the other moms there that day were (or were not) wearing. But I can tell you which ones let their kids run amok (namely myself). And I can tell you which ones were kind to their kids. And I can tell you how efficient the checkout guy was.
Lesson learned: how I look is not nearly as important as how I act. And if I leave the house looking sub-par, odds are I'll be the only one who notices (and maybe not even that). So if I want to get dressed up, or lose a few pounds, or wear lots of makeup or make sure my shoes match my clothes - bonus. But if I keep a little mommy-fluff, or run out of time to brush my hair, or can't find anything but bedroom slippers to wear on my feet - no one else is going to care! They only care that my kids are well behaved, that I'm courteous and timely and that I genuinely care if they've had a good day.
I need to focus out, not in. After all, as the adage goes, the best accessory is a smile :)
Tuesday, May 31, 2011
We had 3/4 of a cake left, a HUGE pile of macaroni, three candy bars, two bottles of soda, a bag of chips - I'm fairly sure there was more. And we ate it. All of it. We nibbled the cake till it was gone. We ate chips and ice cream and candy and soda while we watched Star Trek in the evening. I even cooked more pasta and ate lots of cereal because by day 3 I'd give up. I convinced myself that since my sister and her family were coming to town and I'd have less control over the menu (though they eat very healthily) and we were celebrating my nephew's birthday (with cake), I might as well just eat whatever I wanted all week, and start over on Tuesday.
BIG mistake. I feel awful. I'm bloated and sleepy and cranky and have gained back at least 3 of the 9.5 lbs I worked so hard to lose. My skin is raw and angry again and my tummy hurts a lot. So, today, I'm back to the diet. Mostly. I did make tuna salad for lunch, but we ate it on rice cakes with lots of veggies (and, ok, I admit to putting cream cheese in my corn...) I'm planning beans and rice and veggies for dinner - every night this week. And we've set up a new system for keeping on track.
Since we're no longer earning time for a splurge, we needed new motivation for eating clean. We've devised a new points system - 2 points for a perfect day, 1 point if we have minimal animal products, 0 points if we have sugar/pasta/junk. When we collectively earn 100 points, we can reward ourselves with a date night (one that hopefully doesn't involve Golden Corral or a similar pig-out :p). This will also help us regulate the frequency of date nights, as they're getting expensive now that we need a sitter.
So, another lesson learned the hard way. Lifestyle changes are hard to make, but we're getting there. I'm also considering switching to organic dairy and meat (for health and because it'll help me eat less of it) and maybe trying to buy organic for the 'dirty dozen' produce. And, we're nearly done with the basement, so hopefully we can plug the machines back in and break a sweat again (in the meantime, I need to make more of an effort to get in a walk in the evening). Two steps forward, one step back. At least I'm motivated to keep up the healthy eating - it really does make me feel SO much better :) Oh, and my sister taught me a couple of awesome recipes (lasagna and quiche) that substitute whole grain millet for pasta or crust - super yummy and much healthier!
As I'm continuing to tweak my menu and learn new recipes, I'll keep asking you all for your tips and advice. Do you have any great dairy-free (pasta-free) recipes you want to share? Anything vegan, raw, or vegetarian? Any super yummy whole-grain recipes? Any great smoothie or juice concoctions to pass along? I always appreciate any help I can get! You guys are great!
Monday, May 23, 2011
My husband and I have been planning for and anticipating this meal for three weeks. And the longer we were on the diet, the more grandiose the meal became. At first, we were only going to have a few candy bars to break our diet. By Sunday night my menu included: homemade sherried caramelized-onion two cheese macaroni with hot dogs, chocolate cake with chocolate frosting and vanilla ice cream, two pieces of artisan chocolate, and some rootbeer. My husband had lined up: two frozen pizzas, rootbeer, orange soda, a small sleeve powdered sugar donuts, oreos and kettle chips. Woah. We both wound up with about 2.5 hours to eat all our goodies (after all our 'cheat' time had been subtracted) and we were so excited! We had two episodes of Star Trek to watch and our huge pile of food to eat....
But a funny thing happens when you eat healthy, fiber filled food. Your stomach shrinks. You're eating well, so you don't need to eat as much. And eventually you can't eat as much if you try. I only used 29 minutes out of my 2.5 hours. I had one small plate of the incredibly rich macaroni, half a medium size piece of cake, a small scoop of ice cream and two glasses of rootbeer. Oh, and half of each piece of artisan chocolate. And I was miserably stuff. Not only that, but I was so used to eating fresh tasting foods that all those rich, sweet treats made me shiver. My husband managed to do a little better with his food (I think he finished the pizza and donuts, but most of the oreos are still standing and the chips are unopened). I was both very disappointed that my gorging was so short lived, and also pretty grateful that I wasn't so full of junk that I'd be miserable in the morning.
And I wasn't. I feel pretty good today, actually. I even had even recovered from the splurge enough by lunchtime that I finished the boys leftover mac'n'cheese and had a few more bites of cake (yeah, I justified the cheating by reminding myself that I used only 1/5 of my time last night...) And oddly enough, I actually feel like eating healthily this week. True, there's a little cheese and meat and pasta in the meals I planned -but just a little. And in general, I'm most excited about the snap peas and hummus in my fridge.
So was the crazy diet worth it, even though we didn't pig out like we expected? Totally! I feel healthy, I feel happy, and my pre-baby jeans are already loose! (I even managed to squeeze into a size 1 skirt yesterday - though it sat at my waist instead of my hips like it used to). I only have 12 more pounds to go until I hit my goal weight (I came in at 122 on Sunday) and I'm $60 richer to boot. Now I just can't wait for my hips to stop hurting (someone mentioned that relaxin from pregnancy stays in your system for months post-partum, foo) and for the basement to be finished (so I can get to my elliptical again) and I can start on the next part of my health-makeover plan: Getting in super cardio shape and toning up all these mushy muscles! Here's hoping that by next bikini season I don't have to hide under a cover- up.
Thanks again, everyone, for joining me on this journey - your feedback is always appreciated! :)
Sunday, May 15, 2011
Well, last night when we went for our walk I got 2 miles in at a pretty good pace, then suddenly started feeling woozy, then nearly blacked out. Again. It happened a couple days earlier as well. And has been happening off and on since we started our diet. My conclusion is that I'm once again not getting enough protein and/or carbs to sustain an even blood-sugar level. Oops. We've only got one week of the diet left and even though we're going to attempt to keep going with a healthier eating routine when we're finished, I am definitely adding back in meats and dairy in moderation to help me stay balanced. I'm just not cut out to be a vegan (even though I was eating eggs) or even a vegetarian, although I do tend to eat a vegetarian diet 90% of the week. We'll keep cutting back on sugar and refined grains, and I'll use dairy and meat sparingly, but apparently I just can't live on fruits and veggies and rice alone. (And peanut butter - I've been eating a ton of peanut butter, which probably isn't super healthy or conducive to weight-loss).
Ah well. You live, you learn. I'm going to try to work in more protein this last week and after that, well, I'm really looking forward to getting my cheese back. :D
Friday, May 13, 2011
For the last 4 years, and especially the first 4 months postpartum this last time, I've been on a nasty blue streak. It got so bad toward the end of month 3 p.p. that I actually considered seeking out counseling. But just as I was making up my mind to make the call, I snapped out of it. Just like that. I partly blame all that depression on the crazy roller-coaster I put my hormones on having 3 babies in 3 years. I never gave myself time to re-balance and fully heal before I was pregnant again. Not to mention the fact that I can count on one hand the number of times I've slept through the night in the last 4 years. Add that all up and you get one doozy of a bad mood.
I'm sure, though, that a large contributing factor to my awful moods was my health - particularly my diet. I was one of those silly pregnant women who used my growing bump as an excuse to eat whatever I wanted. "Oh, no one will notice the extra pounds," I'd tell myself. "Besides, I'm eating for two." When I should have been eating even cleaner to give my babies the best nutrients possible and fuel my body for one heckuva long journey, I was stuffing it full of chocolate and ice cream and other comfort foods to combat the hideous fatigue I felt while growing one baby and simultaneously chasing another. By the end of pregnancy #3 I was 60 lbs heavier than pre-kids (and only about 12 of that was baby and accompanying stuff) and just the thought of getting out of bed in the morning was exhausting enough to make me cry.
Well, right around the 4 month mark, I decided that it was time to lose the weight and start eating better. And for the most part, I did. And *surprise* that's about the time I started to feel happier, too. I don't think it really hit home for me, though, till we started our big diet 2 weeks ago. Suddenly I was joyful in the morning. I felt energized despite the lack of sleep (and didn't even crave the chocolate to get me through the day anymore). And I was soooo much calmer and more relaxed with the kids. Not to mention that despite the fact that I have 13 lbs till I hit my goal weight, I finally finally kinda feel pretty again. It's silly that I need to 'feel pretty' to be confident again (and, frankly, I don't know if it's feeling good about how I look that makes me feel happy, or if happiness and thinness are both just products of being healthier), but it helps.
Maybe I can just say that I feel more 'normal' lately - I feel like 'myself' again which I haven't in a long long time. I've even found myself getting back into music I used to like and watching old tv shows I used to like and occasionally get a glimpse of who I am as a single entity instead of being stuck in 'wife mother super busy housekeeper who am I again" mode constantly. We'll just say that I feel balanced. And blessed. Even when my kids are grinding watermelon into the carpet or getting into (joyful) screaming matches or pelting me with Hotwheels. I still want to pause time right here and savor the moment. Which, considering that very recently I was counting the days till the baby started pre-school, is a HUGE step for me.
I'll confess - today I did some yelling. Today I was cranky. Today I didn't eat quite as well as I should have. But, today I am sick. In general, I am feeling really, truly amazing and I am so grateful. I LOVE this feeling and I am thanking God every day for restoring it. And I'm praying that I use it productively - to motivate myself to continue this healthy lifestyle - to use my extra energy playing with my kids - to really take the time to savor the moment. Because before I know it, baby girl WILL be in pre-school and I know I will miss all the chaos. At least, I'll miss this kind of chaos :)
Sorry for all the rambling. I guess it's just my roundabout way of saying that I'm finally learning that if I take care of myself first, I'll be so much better able to take care of everyone else. Here's hoping I can keep it up! Because this is so great!
Monday, May 9, 2011
For three weeks, we will eat only the following:
Fruits and veggies: unlimited
Peanut butter: 2 tbsp/day (or 1-2 oz nuts)
Hummus and salad dressing: 1 tbsp each/day
olive or coconut oil, soy sauce: few tsp for sauteeing
whole grains: small amounts
beans: small amounts
water and tea: unlimited
What we can't eat:
chocolate, sugar, dairy, refined grains (bread, pasta, cereal, cookies, etc), meat
At the end of the three weeks, we have 3 hours to eat as much of our 'splurge' (right now I'm thinking mac'n'cheese and chocolate cake - originally we were thinking candy) as we can. And then we'll stop and freeze whatever is left.
As an incentive to be good, every time we 'cheat' on the diet we lose 5-30 minutes (depending on the size of the cheat - a cookie is 5 min, a BBQ lunch is 30) from our final splurge. To earn time back, we have to work out (1 mile walked/run = 5 minutes back, 1 situp/pushup/etc = 1 second back).
Ideally in the end we'll continue the diet eating well Monday-Saturday afternoon. Saturday nights will be our 'splurge' nights (within reason of course) and Sundays we eat at Grandma's so we'll do the best we can, but treats are ok there too. We're trying to walk/run 3 miles every night and do strength stuff every other night as a habit (once we get our basement back it should be a breeze to work out to Star Trek again).
And like I said - I can't believe how amazing I feel! I've already lost a few pounds (my scale stinks so much it's debatable how much) and I feel not only thinner, but more energetic and like my whole body is functioning more smoothly. Even my skin is clearing up. Woohoo! I don't crave things like I did anymore (yes I was drooling over the cookies on Sunday, but I was able to stop at just a couple instead of eating the whole plateful and still felt satisfied - and I did 'run off' my time). So I'm very excited about the prospect of a healthier lifestyle.
That said, I'm terrible at cooking on a primarily produce diet (it'll be easier after the 3 weeks when I get all my condiments back). So if anyone has any super yummy vegan/non-dairy vegetarian recipes they want to share, I'm all ears :) (We have found that frozen-fruit-though-the-juicer ice cream is not only a very satisfying dessert, but is about the only thing we can actually get our kids to eat on this diet - so we've been eating a TON of that and I'm really surprised how well it satisfies even my ravenous sweet tooth :D )
Wednesday, April 27, 2011
Soooo, I guess that's the rundown for now - wish me luck, I've got to get out of this funk. Cannot wait till it's watermelon season - I could live on that stuff :)
Thursday, April 21, 2011
Monday, April 18, 2011
Tuesday, April 12, 2011
1 Timothy 2:9-10
Likewise also that women should adorn themselves in respectable apparel, with modesty and self-control, not with braided hair and gold or pearls or costly attire, but with what is proper for women who profess godliness—with good works.
1 Corinthians 6:19-20
Or do you not know that your body is a temple of the Holy Spirit within you, whom you have from God? You are not your own, for you were bought with a price. So glorify God in your body.
Charm is deceitful, and beauty is vain, but a woman who fears the Lord is to be praised.
1 Peter 3:1-4
Likewise, wives, be subject to your own husbands, so that even if some do not obey the word, they may be won without a word by the conduct of their wives, when they see your respectful and pure conduct. Do not let your adorning be external—the braiding of hair and the putting on of gold jewelry, or the clothing you wear— but let your adorning be the hidden person of the heart with the imperishable beauty of a gentle and quiet spirit, which in God's sight is very precious.
Like a gold ring in a pig's snout is a beautiful woman without discretion.
But I say to you that everyone who looks at a woman with lustful intent has already committed adultery with her in his heart.
So what is my real goal in becoming thinner again? Is it to make men stumble? To garner praise for myself? To overcompensate for a lack of inner beauty? The only man who matters already thinks I'm beautiful. I am not deserving of praise - that belongs to the Lord. And if I feel lacking in spiritual riches I need to spend as much time in my Bible as I do on the treadmill. The whole point of my (often faltering) fitness regime was to make this body that the Lord has given me a more productive tool for His work. It is not to gain glory for myself. Therefore I need to focus less on how I appear on the outside (without, of course, neglecting hygiene and fashion entirely) and focus more on being beautiful on the inside (kind, patient, gentle, generous...). That will bring me far greater joy than squeezing into a size 2 again and will bring much greater glory to the Lord. But sometimes, I just need a little reminder...
Monday, April 4, 2011
Week 11(12): Keep up the good work
This week is all about maintenance. Have a look back at the previous 10 weeks of advice and tweak anything you've slacked off on. Come up with a plan to keep it up. Have you lost any weight during the 12 weeks? I think I've shed about 3 lbs - which is something, I guess. Not gonna win the Biggest Loser competition, but that's ok.
So, how did you do? Did you at least attempt all 11 weeks? If so, leave me a comment and you'll be entered into that giveaway I mentioned. Best wishes for a happy weight loss journey from here on out!!
Tuesday, March 29, 2011
Friday, March 25, 2011
This morning I stumbled upon a pro-ana (aka pro-anorexia) website while doing a little (mostly innocent) web searching. Ok, no, I didn't learn from my previous post and yes, I did Google "How did Jolene Blalock get so skinny?" (apparently she'd been a model and thus on a chronic diet since she was 17). I found myself horrified, however, not by what was on that site, but by the frequency with which I used to visit such sites. And that I used to think they were filled with really 'good advice.' *shudder*
When I was 19, through a semester of being overworked, overtired, overstressed and various other things, I lost 16 lbs. This dropped me from 116 lbs to 100 lbs. Which is a reasonable weight for someone who's 5'2." But along with the weight loss came control issues and an addiction to being thin. I'd felt chubby and ugly all my life and somehow fitting into a size 2 made me feel 'normal' - seeing all my ribs and hip bones made me feel pretty. And while my semester was rapidly getting away from me, one thing I could control was what I ate. Believe me, I had no idea what I was doing. I didn't label it an eating disorder until I was out of college - at least, I didn't admit that's what it was. I just thought that I wanted to be thin 'like all the popular girls.' Even when I hit 95 lbs, I didn't think I was thin enough. I've always been pear shaped and somehow that made me feel fat, even though looking back at pictures of us all I was much bonier than any of the girls I wanted to be just like. But such is the nature of the beast.
At my lowest point I was eating 500 calories a day - though not all at once, so no one would notice how little I ate. Even after I was married and officially an 'adult' I was still only eating 900 calories on a good day and spending plenty of time on pro-ana sites. Sites with such 'good advice' as "drink lots of ice water so you'll burn calories warming up" and "if you're about to pass out, eat a peppermint, it'll give you a hit of sugar and quell your cravings." Advice that I followed frequently. As anyone who's ever skipped a meal (or 3) will tell you, hunger is miserable. I thought that being thin would make me happy, but constantly starving like that made me insanely cranky and depressed. I'm really surprised my roomates didn't kick me out in college.
Finally, I became pregnant with my first child. The childbirth class we took put us on a strict (healthy) diet and I began to remember what it felt like to be healthy and full. And I loved it. No more dizzy spells, no more crankiness, no more abject depression. I needed energy to keep up with my kids. These days I definitely eat. I'm even struggling to lose weight. But it's a hard hard process because, though I'm healthier now, there's a part of me that knows how to do it the 'easy way' - the way that will get me exactly what I want and make me miserable in the process. So I generally try to stay away from the old websites and, as much as possible, not surround myself with images of super skinny models. Because I'm well now and there's no going back.
Well, that's my warning - to myself and to anyone else who might be tempted to lose weight 'the easy way.' In short, just don't do it. It's not worth it. Of course supermodels never smile - being too thin made me cranky, too :p
Monday, March 21, 2011
Well, we're almost done. How have you been doing? Lost any weight? Sadly, I've only managed to lose about 3 lbs. On the otherhand, these sneaky pitfalls are what keep getting me down. This week we are working on avoiding negative thinking, and getting in our exercise even when we don't feel like it.
There isn't much to expound upon here - the only tips the article mentions are keeping on hand a list of 10 things you love about yourself that you can reference when you're having a 'fat day' and forcing yourself to work out for just 5 minutes even when you don't want to (often that 5 minutes will turn into a whole workout session).
The biggest goal for this week is simply to keep up the good work. Lets look back over the last 9 weeks' challenges and get re-focused. And don't forget to have fun whenever you can!
Friday, March 18, 2011
I also mentioned that media is my nemesis when it comes to self image. Hubby and I have been watching Star Trek: Enterprise lately and, of course, it's full of impossibly thin and gorgeous women. And, of course, I found myself desiring very much to look just like Subcommander T'Pol:
Note the jutting hipbones and itty bitty ribcage. Even if I ate nothing, ever, I could never look like that. Then we saw an episode which required said officer to remove her shirt and hubby exclaimed "ew, you can see all her bones!" As in, he doesn't find waiflike attractive. And I thought to myself - then what on earth am I setting myself up for?
And thinking back to my earliest posts and my earliest goals I realized how wrong I've gotten it lately. I've been trying to hit a certain weight, squeeze into ancient clothes, look like super-skinny celebrities. But not that long ago my primary goal was "get healthy, get fit" - what happened? It dawned on me yesterday that I'm already a couple pounds under my pre-pregnancy #3 weight. So what if I'm not college weight again - I shouldn't be that thin anymore - and a mommy of 3 really shouldn't have anything skin-tight, cropped or supershort in her wardrobe anyway. So, I'm getting back to my original goals - more working out, healthier eating, better sleep - and whatever shape I wind up, that's what shape I'm meant to be. Besides, all the other Star Trek chicks are sporting this look - and I could totally pull that off right now :)
Monday, March 14, 2011
Week 9: Stay Positive
We all have bad days (or weeks), but the key to not blowing things entirely is to stay positive. If you have a slip up, learn from it and move on! Some ways the article recommends keeping a positive attitude include giving yourself a break (take a hot bath, getting a facial, seeing a movie), buddying up (getting freiends and family to cheer you on or help you out), and practicing optimism (it will get easier, you will do better).
So even if you eat three portions of dinner, make a cake (and eat it all) or just skip the gym for a night - it's ok. Try again the next day and don't get discouraged! This is a little easier said than done for me given that we're on week 9 and I have only lost 3 lbs (maybe) but I can only get better (and thinner) from here :)
Also in my corner was the fact that I finally finally got new sneakers. Why oh why have I not done this sooner!? I had no idea what a difference having real, proper running shoes could make. I've been living in my same cheapo sneakers for the last 5 years and they were seriously falling apart. No wonder my feet were dying by the end of every workout. I finally got it together and went to First Gear (where all my exercize savy friends go) and was so impressed! As soon as I walked in the door they told me to remove my shoes and walk to the back of the room. They then not only told me I'd been wearing the wrong size all this time (so that's why my toes are always bruised) but proceeded to bring out several of the comfiest pairs of shoes I've ever put on. They were light and cushy and breatheable and had some real arch supports in them (take that Dr. Scholl's). I even noticed immediately that the shoes corrected all the problems with my gait that were putting so much stress on my ankle, knee and hip. Hooray! I am so excited about some (relatively) pain free workouts. I wound up with a fanstastic (albeit $$) pair of Brooks sneakers - goodbye Sketchers, hello comfy!
Friday, March 11, 2011
Thursday, March 10, 2011
Wednesday, March 9, 2011
Monday, March 7, 2011
Week 8: Eat Proper Portions.
The gist of this week's challenge is learning what a portion size really looks like. I have a nasty habit of 'guesstimating' what a portion really is - and when I finally do measure my food I'm shocked at how much I overshot. Or, conversely I'm amazed at how much a tablespoon of something really is. Either way, since I'm calorie tracking, I need to be pretty precise with how much I'm really eating. So - this week's goal is to measure everything. Find out how much a cup of peas really is. Or an ounce of cheese (this one gets me every time). Until we can reliably eyeball a portion on a regular basis, we'll measure every food item we eat (or as many as we can - you don't have to haul the food scale to a restaurant).
A couple other tips the article recommends - eating without distraction so you know how much is going into your mouth, and splitting a meal with a friend when out to eat (or asking for half of it to go right off the bat). And don't forget to read the nutritional labels! Not only do we have to know how much a cup of cereal is, we also have to know how many cups of cereal comprise a serving. If 1/2 cup of cereal is only 80 calories but we usually eat 3 servings - that's definitely something to look out for!
Best of luck! I highly recommend keeping a food journal, even if you're not calorie counting. It's amazing to look back at the end of the day and see how much you've really eaten (5 cups of starch but only 2 cups of fruit? Oops, better readjust!) Happy measuring.
Thursday, March 3, 2011
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Sunday, February 27, 2011
Week 7: Strengthen Your Resolve
The goal this week involves making yourself some motivational notecards. The article says to write a motivational phrase on a card and stash it where you'll see it often. Frankly, cheesy mantras don't do a lot for me. I'm a very visual person. So my goal for the week is to post some visual motivation. A picture of 'thin me' on the fridge, the pair of jeans I miss wearing on the top of the pants pile - little things like that. Whatever will get you to behave when you're tempted to splurge (or lounge) is perfect for this week's challenge. So have fun, be creative and stick to it! :)
Friday, February 25, 2011
Current weight: Around 128.5 Still stuck
Triumph of the week: More turbokick and I've been working on throwing in exercise where I can (even did the 'silly mom working out at the playground' thing)
Pitfall of the week: More sweets. Yeah, I baked gingerbread just because we had whipping cream to use up. In hindsight, should have used it for something like pumpkin soup with some redeeming value in it. Also, fell off the no-chocolate bandwagon Monday, wednesday and thursday. Starting over today. I need to get the stuff out of the house because stress makes me crave it soooo bad.
Goal for next week: Keep up the working out, give up the chocolate.
And on a side note, life is getting in the way. I'm a total mess (and not even a hot one :p) emotionally right now and it's not helping me with the whole weight loss issue. On the up-side, I'm not food-restricting to cope - but the whole weight thing is just adding to the other stress I'm putting myself through. Things should resolve some as life gets back to normal (aka rejoining the rest of the world at playgroup and church, getting more God time, etc) and as I get more sleep (everyone here is/has been sick for over a week) - but in the meantime I've made a pact with myself to cut myself some slack. The baby is only 3 months old. The only reason I lost weight fast with my first two is because I never made time to eat and wasn't taking care of myself. As they say "it takes 9 months to put the weight on (or in this case 3 years) so we can't expect it to come right off." So my goal is just going to be do the best I can and not worry about what I weigh or how fat I 'feel.' The people who love me don't care if my tummy is a little poochy or I can barely squeeze into my jeans. I need to take care of my emotional health before I worry about 'getting skinny' - because if I don't I'm going to lose perspective and my goal will change from 'slimmer and toned' to 'skinny' to 'too skinny' and that can't happen. Not to mention that if I focus on hating how I look it'll morph into hating myself and that won't help me get better either. And this coming week is going to be extra-stressful just off the bat so I'm forgiving myself for planning a couple nights of frozen pizza and mac'n'cheese (with plenty of veggies on the side of course). Anyway, sorry for the rant - just thought I'd put out there where I am now and possibly why I'm not losing a pound and how I'm dealing with it at the moment :) So - how are things going for you?