If you were paying attention to my earlier posts, you noticed that I have a bit of a problem with setting realistic goals. I find a 'body model' and work toward it - until I find a 'better' one and then another and another until my expectations are totally unrealistic and I'm down on myself again because I'm not thin enough or pretty enough or bony enough or..... Despite my noble goals, here I am again.
I also mentioned that media is my nemesis when it comes to self image. Hubby and I have been watching Star Trek: Enterprise lately and, of course, it's full of impossibly thin and gorgeous women. And, of course, I found myself desiring very much to look just like Subcommander T'Pol:
Note the jutting hipbones and itty bitty ribcage. Even if I ate nothing, ever, I could never look like that. Then we saw an episode which required said officer to remove her shirt and hubby exclaimed "ew, you can see all her bones!" As in, he doesn't find waiflike attractive. And I thought to myself - then what on earth am I setting myself up for?
And thinking back to my earliest posts and my earliest goals I realized how wrong I've gotten it lately. I've been trying to hit a certain weight, squeeze into ancient clothes, look like super-skinny celebrities. But not that long ago my primary goal was "get healthy, get fit" - what happened? It dawned on me yesterday that I'm already a couple pounds under my pre-pregnancy #3 weight. So what if I'm not college weight again - I shouldn't be that thin anymore - and a mommy of 3 really shouldn't have anything skin-tight, cropped or supershort in her wardrobe anyway. So, I'm getting back to my original goals - more working out, healthier eating, better sleep - and whatever shape I wind up, that's what shape I'm meant to be. Besides, all the other Star Trek chicks are sporting this look - and I could totally pull that off right now :)